March 4, 2012

The Biking Columbus Theorem

The Dispatch has an article out about the State of Ohio payroll for employees. This paragraph really caught my interest [emphasis added]:
"Employee use of sick leave, vacation time and personal leave, which dropped in 2010, rose in 2011. The state paid $74.8 million in sick pay (up 10.5 percent), $209.6 million in vacation time (up 15.7 percent), and $8.4 million in personal leave (up 53.5 percent). Some 10 dozen workers took home more than $10,000 in sick pay."
I was taken aback by the term "some 10 dozen." My understanding of journalism is that statistical based numbers should be absolute. "Some" implies that there may be more or less than "10 dozen." And furthermore, why use dozen? If there are 119 workers who took home more than $10,000 in sick pay, just use 119 rather than "some 10 dozen." Or if it is exactly 120, then just use 120.

I bring this up because 10 dozen got me thinking about the multiplication tables. I discovered a boring fact about numbers.

I randomly found out that 12*10=120 is 1 more than 11*11 = 121. It seemed odd that the square of a number would be one more than the number + 1 times number - 1. Would this pattern hold true elsewhere?

4*6 = 24     5*5 = 25
8*10 = 80   9*9 = 81

WHAT?!?!?! I tried to see if this arguably worthless theorem, postulate, hypothesis, whatever it is was already credited to someone but I couldn't find anything. So without further ado, here is the Biking Columbus Theorem:

For any integer n, n^2 = 1+ (n-1) * (n+1).

You are welcome world. BTW, if you simplify the right hand side of the equation, it works out to be n^2 so it shows just how worthless this theorem is. 


  1. That's the kind of worthless stuff I love! The Biking Columbus Theorem rules!

    1. Be assured that as long as you keep reading Biking Columbus that you will continue to receive similar worthless stuff.

  2. Mr. Parker would be proud.

  3. If Mr. Parker can have a pancake thing in a math book, why can't I have a theorem, right?


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